Gratitude

It’s a rainy, dismal winter day, a day to stay inside.  Time for some serious gratitude work.  I went to the senior’s exercise class at our local fire hall this morning and discovered I am woefully out of shape.  I am committed to going  at least twice a week as I am aware of how much these sessions will help me. We are so fortunate to have this resource right down the street.  

I’ve been reading some of my friend’s journals in which she often listed the things for which she was grateful..  Now that she is gone reading her journals is a bit like a visit with her, a reminder of how positive she remained during her long journey with cancer.  The closer she came to her death, the more focused she was on gratitude and the life she’d been given.  That became very evident as she moved away from us toward what she perceived as something wonderful, if unknowable.

She reminded me that gratitude is more than writing down lists of the things for which we are grateful, though that is important.  Gratitude is a state of mind, a way of being.  Gratitude does not come naturally. It has to be chosen, worked at, and practiced over and over again until it becomes second nature. It’s like when we use affirmations or sentence prayers. They only work if we repeat them over and over and over until they eventually become lodged somewhere deep in our hearts.  When that happens, it’s as if they create a loop that runs constantly in our subconscious, helping us choose gratitude and a positive stance toward life.

I am so grateful for the 12-step program and all it taught me about letting go as an integral part of living a life filled with gratitude.  Letting go of our resentments, bitter memories, defense mechanisms, and denials opens us to gratitude and a new way of perceiving life.   I look at what is happening in the world and am saddened and often fearful, yet that does not negate the fact that I am surrounded with goodness, opportunities, and so many things and ways of being grateful.  I am choosing not to obsess over the news, which feels negative, indeed, but to focus on what is good and positive, the things I can impact, do something about, and make a difference, however small.  If each of us practiced gratitude and made an effort to look for the positive, the world would be a very different place.  So maybe practicing gratitude is a very important way we can choose to live our lives.  Not denying what is, but looking beyond to what could be if we each made the effort.  

I am grateful for so much, and one of the things that is high on my list is these blogs or whatever my ramblings have become.  There is something cathartic and freeing about my daily rambles that’s almost like meditation.   As I dig for topics, for something to share with all of you, I often find the words coming from somewhere else, as if they aren’t mine.  And so, I am exceedingly grateful for each of you who takes time to read my thoughts, inspiring me to keep writing, and whomever takes time occasionally to respond with thoughts of your own.

My wish for you on this dark and dismal winter day is that your day is filled with light, love, and an overflowing sense of gratitude and inner peace.