Most of our problems, I’ve come to realize, exist in our heads. It’s not that challenges don’t exist. They do, and some are really serious, but it’s the spin we put on them that causes us pain and suffering. My sleep issues, for example. I recently read that we need a good 8 hours of sleep a night to allow our brains to clean out the chaff and junk that we put in them every day. So, instead of being fairly relaxed about my erratic sleep patterns, I’ve started obsessing about them. Silly me.
I had a long talk with a loved one recently who was so consumed with anger that he was incapable of coming up with a solution to his problem. Instead of grabbing hold of his issues, he wanted the other person to change. He was feeling trapped, but the longer he talked the clearer it became, there were some fairly clear, if not easy, solutions open to him, His problem was being afraid to assert himself and accept responsibility for himself. He was panicking rather than doing Step One…admitting that he was powerless over this other individual and that by focusing on her and her demands, he was making his life unmanageable.
We get so attached to how we think things should be that we can’t see all of the other possibilities that exist. We cling to the familiar even when it is unpleasant or even painful rather than risking change. In fact, we can learn to love our misery. It took me almost two years to adjust to selling the farm and moving to town. I knew it was the best decision for both of us, especially my husband, but I still grieved my past life and wanted it back. Now I am happier than I have ever been, simply because I have accepted where I am and the stage of life I am living. I could fight getting older and frailer, but what good would that do? I might as well make the most of what I still have.
There is so much good and bad in the world, but there’s one thing we can do to help ourselves: shut out the ads that tell us that we can’t be happy without this or that and stop being constantly bombarded with bad news so that we become consumed with fear. Not only that, but advertisers know that creating discontent and fear is a great motivator for sales. It’s been over two years since I turned off the TV with all of its ads. Now, I only watch things I can stream that are ad-free, and what a relief! I know what I need to function and to be content. Besides, more stuff just complicates my life, and my doctor knows what medications I need, if any. I don’t need to be brainwashed into thinking I need to take this or that.
This morning’s ramblings remind me of a line from one of the translations of the Lord’s Prayer I often pray. “Don’t let surface things delude us, but free us from what holds us back.” With that as my mantra for the morning, I’m going to warm up my coffee and head upstairs to work on a quilt. Let’s all try to detach and allow the Good Lord to be in charge instead of thinking we have to solve the world’s problems. That way, we can all have a good day, even with everything that is going on.
that Joyce, she is one wise, caring lady; I would do well to hear her points and listen to her wisdom……Oh, happy day!